


Don we now our gay apparel

by aces_low



Series: It's All Relative [2]
Category: Generation Kill
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Gift Giving, M/M, Ugly Holiday Sweaters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-15 17:55:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13036389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aces_low/pseuds/aces_low
Summary: "I have a pretty big collection of Christmas sweaters and that’s really all I wear around this time.”He can’t do anything but stare at Evan for a long moment before all his brain can come up with is, “why?”“It’s Christmas time,” Evan answers, looking at Nate like he’s the one wearing a light up Christmas sweater and acting like it’s normal.-Evan likes ugly Christmas sweaters, and Nate has no idea what to do about that.Written for Gen Kill holidays - Day 5 - Ugly Christmas Sweaters





	Don we now our gay apparel

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Gen Kill holiday - Day 5 - Ugly Christmas Sweaters
> 
> Not sure if this is in the same universe as 'Then Color Me In' - I think it can be, but it definitely isn't a required reading for this.
> 
> This is not meant to be a representation of the real men, just based on the characters of the HBO series.

When Evan answers the door Nate is immediately accosted with the brightest Christmas sweater he thinks he’s ever seen, literally.

The sweater Evan is wearing is black and red but all around it are Christmas light designs, and some of those lights seem to be blinking at random. Nate is so distracted by the sweater that he jumps in surprise when Evan kisses his cheek.

“Hey, you okay?” Evan asks with a laugh in his voice at startling Nate.

“Oh, yeah, sorry. Hi,” Nate says, finally greeting his boyfriend properly and following him inside his apartment. “So, uh, nice sweater.”

Evan turns and grins, looking down and pinching the wool in his fingers. “Isn’t it great? I just found it last week.”

“Did you go somewhere today?” he asks as they walk into the kitchen where Evan is making dinner.

He doesn’t remember Evan mentioning anything about an ugly Christmas sweater party anywhere, but he can’t imagine why else he’d be wearing that thing.

“Hm? Nope. Well, I had to make a deposit at the bank, but other than that I’ve been home writing most of the day,” Evan tells him.

“So, you’ve just been wearing that sweater around your apartment all day?”

“Sure,” Evan says with a shrug before his eyes light up with a new thought. “Oh, I completely forgot, this is our first winter together. I have a pretty big collection of Christmas sweaters and that’s really all I wear around this time.”

He can’t do anything but stare at Evan for a long moment before all his brain can come up with is, “why?”

“It’s Christmas time,” Evan answers, looking at Nate like he’s the one wearing a light up Christmas sweater and acting like it’s normal.

He turns toward the oven as the timer goes off and Nate feels something like worry settle in his stomach.

 

Evan’s claims are confirmed two days later when they meet up for coffee during Nate’s break and he walks into the shop wearing a sweater that appears to have a reindeer throwing up large amounts of candy canes and holly and, inexplicably, little Santa hats.

Nate looks around at the other patrons to see if they’ve noticed his boyfriend’s sweater too, but nobody seems to be quite as startled by it as Nate.

“Cool sweater,” Nate says when Evan reaches the table he’s saved for them.

Evan looks down and laughs. “Isn’t it hilarious? I’m gonna grab something, you good?”

Nate nods and watches Evan walk up to the counter feeling a small sense of relief. So, maybe Evan wears them, but maybe it’s ironic in its tackiness, he wouldn’t put it past Evan to wear something ironically. Though it’s not like Evan’s a stranger to wearing something tacky, Nate is just glad that he seems to have retired his gold chain.

The problem is, he genuinely doesn’t know if Evan thinks these sweaters are cool, or if he’s wearing them for the weird factor of it all. He can see him falling on either side.

“Any big plans this afternoon?” he asks when Evan sits down.

“Seeing you.”

Nate grins at Evan’s sappiness, he’s never liked cheesy, romantic things until he started dating Evan. Now, it never fails to make his insides warm.

“Just work,” Evan continues with a shrug, knowing what Nate’s question had really been referring to.

“Did you put that on for this?”

Evan blinks and narrows his eyes at Nate in confusion before looking down at his sweater again when he realizes what Nate’s referring to. Clearly, he’s forgotten about it already, something Nate does not have the ability to do, as it is right in his line of sight.

“No, was just wearing it, why?”

Nate reaches across the table to squeeze Evan’s hand.

“No reason.”

 

The next time they see each other, Nate keeps his mouth shut about the sweater – bright green with a large red bow taking up most of the front, to make Evan look like a Christmas present – in hopes that Evan will make a comment on it, giving him some kind of hint at his true feelings about the sweaters.

But Evan doesn’t act like he’s wearing anything less than normal, and Nate just sends him a smile or kisses his cheek when Evan catches him grimacing at his chest.

 

“Eager?” Evan jokes as Nate pulls the sweater up and over Evan’s head, throwing it across the room, and backs him up toward the bed.

Eager to not have a gigantic Santa face staring at him while he’s trying to make out with his boyfriend is what Nate really wants to say. Instead, he just pulls his own shirt off, steps into Evan’s space again, and kisses him hard.

 

“Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?” Evan says as soon as Nate opens the door.

It’s pretty early on a Tuesday, and Nate hadn’t expected to see Evan today. It’d be a nice surprise if Evan didn’t look so grim and he hadn’t basically just said that they needed to talk.

“What’s up?” Nate asks, leading Evan over to the couch.

His stomach is doing flips as he thinks of all the things Evan may want to talk about, and none of them are making him feel better.

“Is everything ok?” he asks when Evan doesn’t immediately speak.

Evan sends him a tight grin. “I was just about to ask you the same thing.”

“What?”

He takes the spot next to Evan, keeping a small bit of space between them as he waits to hear what the problem is.

“Things have been kind of…weird lately,” Evan says, grimacing at his words, keeping his eyes averted. “I can’t put my finger on what it is, but something just feels off.”

Nate furrows his eyebrows. “With us?”

Evan bites his lip and nods, finally looking at Nate, his eyes tired and guarded.

“Are you…upset with me, or is something going on that I should know about?”

That shocks Nate enough to close that final gap of space and take one of Evan’s hands in his own. “No, of course not. What makes you think that?”

“I don’t know,” Evan says shaking his head. “You’ve just felt distant lately, but when I replay our time together in my head I don’t have any evidence for that, so I’ve been telling myself I’m just being insecure. But it feels like every time we see each other lately I walk away feeling like you’re not telling me something. I don’t know, I’m sorry, this is completely baseless and I can’t explain it. I just…I couldn’t sleep last night and I just decided we should talk, it always makes me feel better when we can talk.”

Nate’s eyes widen in shock, he hadn’t thought his issues about Evan’s sweaters had been so obvious that Evan now feels like there’s something wrong with their relationship.

He’s really been trying these past few weeks to just keep his mouth shut and not focus too hard on what Evan is wearing, and he’s been getting better at it. He’s found that not all of Evan’s Christmas sweaters are loud and weird, some just have pale snowflakes and silhouettes of reindeer and Christmas trees, that are by no means fashionable – Evan is not particularly fashionable any time of year – but they look cozy and they’re not completely hideous. Nate wouldn’t fault him for wearing those sweaters if it weren’t for the rest of the time when he wears ones with things like gingerbread men that say ‘bite me’ or that literally play ‘We Wish You a Merry Christmas’ or like the one he’s wearing now that’s just stripes of presents and candy canes and snowmen and Christmas trees, not his most over the top sweater, yet it’s still one of the ugliest Nate thinks he’s ever seen.

The problem is, he’s going to have to tell Evan the truth now. He’d planned to go to the grave with his opinions of Evan’s sweaters tucked away in his brain, and ideally get used to them over their coming years together. But he can’t just let Evan think that he’s pulling away, or, god forbid, cheating.

He takes a deep breath and tightens his hold on Evan’s hand.

“Don’t get upset,” he says, and Evan nods, though there’s a tightness in his eyes now and Nate is sure he’s bracing himself for the worst. “It’s all your ugly Christmas sweaters that I’ve realized that you genuinely like and I’ve just been trying to adjust to looking at them.”

Evan blinks at him for a long time, clearly, this is not where he’d expected this conversation to go.

“My- you don’t…My Christmas sweaters?” Evan speaks slowly, looking down at the one he’s wearing now before looking back up at Nate dubiously.

“I’m sorry,” Nate says, pushing himself even more into Evan’s space, sort of wishing he could take it back but also relieved that it’s out there now.

“You’ve been acting weird because you don’t like my Christmas sweaters?” Evan asks again.

“I didn’t think I was being so obvious.”

“All of them?”

Nate shrugs. “Some are better than others.”

“What about this one?” Evan asks, looking down at the one he’s wearing again.

He hesitates for a moment, but this is a time for honesty, so he takes a deep breath and says, “Evan, that sweater might be the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen you wear.”

At Evan’s widening eyes Nate grabs him and kisses him, hoping to lighten the sting of his very truthful insult.

When he pulls away, Evan doesn’t look devastated by his words so he takes a chance. “Where did you get that thing anyway?”

“A garage sale,” Evan says with a shrug.

Nate has to bite his lip to keep from grinning. “Is that where you get most of them?”

“Yeah, usually.”

“Did it ever occur to you that those sweaters were probably once worn for an ugly Christmas sweater party and are now being sold as the owner has no other use for it?”

Evan frowns and looks down at his sweater again, pulling at the wool and studying it like he hadn’t really taken a proper look at the thing before now.

Nate catches himself frowning right back, realizing he’s probably being way too harsh, this is why he’d originally planned on dying with this opinion of his.

“I’m sorry,” Nate says again when Evan doesn’t add anything else. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“No, no, you didn’t. Honestly, right now, I’m more relieved than anything. Feel a little like my world has been rocked on its side, but as long as we’re ok that’s really all that matters to me.”

“We’re ok,” Nate promises, leaning in to kiss Evan again.

Evan grins when he pulls back and Nate feels his insides warm again, thrilled to finally have this off his chest now.

 

Only, the next night, when he goes over to Evan’s for dinner, Evan is wearing a plain, black sweatshirt.

Nate frowns when Evan opens the door.

Evan smiles wide and kisses his cheek in greeting as always, but Nate can’t help but ask, “why are you wearing that?” as he follows Evan into the kitchen.

“It’s cold,” Evan says with a shrug.

“Why aren’t you wearing one of your Christmas sweaters?”

Evan’s cheeks turn pink at the mention and he ducks his head and turns away, busying himself with the oven. 

“Please don’t tell me you stopped wearing them because of what I said.” Nate feels a sinking in his stomach, knowing that’s exactly what’s happening. When Evan had left his place yesterday it had felt like he was in good spirits, but now it’s clear that Nate had been too forthcoming on his feelings about the sweaters.

“No, I’m gonna still wear them,” Evan assures him, and Nate feels the pit in his stomach lessen just a little bit.

“So, why didn’t you wear one today?”

“I did.”

Nate narrows his eyes at the back of Evan’s head for a moment but Evan doesn’t turn around.

“You changed because I was coming over,” he says, it’s not a question, because he knows it’s true, and he’s back to feeling like an asshole again.

“Sure, this way we both win. You don’t have to look at them and I get a boyfriend who doesn’t hate looking at me.”

“I didn’t hate looking at you,” Nate insists, rounding the island to stand next to where Evan is chopping a pepper.

Evan turns to look at him. “I thought you’d be happy.”

Nate doesn’t know how to explain how unhappy he is with this decision. Maybe if Evan had decided to do this on his own, without Nate having to say what he’d said, this wouldn’t feel so bad. But now he just feels like all he really did was act like a jerk and made Evan feel bad about his wardrobe choices.

Instead of any of that, he just says, “don’t change what you wear for me. I don’t get a say in your clothes.”

That makes Evan roll his eyes. “Why would I wear something I know you don’t like? Seriously, Nate, it’s not an issue.”

He leans over and up to place a short kiss on Nate’s lips before going back to chopping.

Nate goes back to his seat at the island and decides not to push the issue tonight.

 

“Happy Christmas Eve,” Nate greets Evan once he’s finally decided to join the conscious world.

Evan grins and kisses his cheek before grabbing the mug Nate had left out for him to pour some coffee.

“I have a present for you,” Nate tells him, already starting to feel excited.

“Who exchanges presents on the morning of Christmas Eve?” Evan asks, tilting his head.

Nate shrugs. “We do. Don’t worry, I have something for you to open tomorrow morning before we go to my parents too.”

Evan grins and shakes his head. “Fine, but now I’ve gotta figure out which present I want to give you now.”

“You don’t have to give me mine now, I just can’t wait anymore,” Nate says, leading Evan into the living room.

Evan narrows his eyes at the two presents that Nate had left on the coffee table.

“I thought you said it was one present.”

“I told you I had a present, and then didn’t mention the other,” Nate says, grinning at his skewed reasoning and Evan’s glare.

Nate tugs Evan down onto the couch and reaches for the one with candy cane striped wrapping paper.

“Here, open this one first.”

He watches Evan’s face as he unwraps his gift.

“Oh,” Evan says when he opens the box to reveal a chunky, navy colored sweater with small, tasteful patterns of bells and holly stitched in.

“I thought you could wear it tomorrow,” Nate tells him, watching as Evan thumbs at the soft fabric.

“Thank you, it’s great.”

“Yeah?”

Evan grins and leans in to kiss him softly.

“Really,” he says, grinning wide. “And it works for both of us. A Christmas sweater for me, and not an eyesore for you, right?”

Nate chuckles. “Something like that. Now, this one.”

Evan huffs and shakes his head, but sets the box with his new sweater aside to take the new box, this one wrapped in snowmen wrapping paper.

“And I thought you could wear this today,” Nate says as Evan opens the box, revealing a dark red sweater with a large wreath covering the front of it.

The wreath has bows and bells, as well as several small, twinkling lights that start blinking when Evan pushes the button provided.

Evan shakes his head and looks over. “Nate.”

“I hate that you don’t wear your Christmas sweaters around me anymore,” Nate says defensively.

“You told me they were ugly,” Evan fires back.

“Just because your sweaters are ugly doesn’t mean you are when you wear them.”

Evan looks back down at the sweater. “It’s really not a big deal, Nate.”

“What’ll you do if we start living together? Just get rid of all your sweaters?” Nate asks, shaking his head. “No, because I don’t want to be responsible for making you unhappy. Your sweaters make you happy, I never want to be the person that takes any kind of happiness away from you, even if it is a dorky sweater. You look good in them because you feel good in them, and I’m sorry I didn’t see that until I saw you out of them.”

“You know, you make me happier than any dumb sweater, right?”

Nate shakes his head, not wanting Evan to distract him by being sweet and romantic. He has a point to prove.

“Do you like it? I wasn’t really sure if it was the type you like, and I-“

Evan cuts Nate off with a kiss. He has a bright grin on his face when he pulls back that Nate can feel himself mirroring.

“It’s perfect.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.
> 
> Happy Holidays!


End file.
